Gifs via misskamala

“It’s not about adding diversity for the sake of diversity, it’s about subtracting homogeneity for the sake of realism.” ― Mary Robinette Kowal

So...it's time to talk about the bastardization of #RepresentationMatters. 

To start, I just want to say I have begun to grow weary of many social movements which persist long after having fully gone askew from its origins. I have also become even more wary of some, if not most, Hollywood celeb-fronted movements. This is not for the lack of any validity or necessity behind them - rather it is the underhanded way in which these movements, once skewed, succumb to the same behind-the-scenes downfall unbeknownst to me. All the while, in spite of the behind-the-scenes dumpster fire, I am continually and persistently spoon fed messages which uphold some alleged form of 'change'.

At this current moment, from every spigot of media at which I sip, a story written to the tune of #RepresentationMatters is shoved down my throat by some group of unnamed Hollywood players. Of course, none of this is real or means much of anything as I have quickly come to recognize the over promotion of #RepresentationMatters as it pertains to entertainment media is mainly done in chase of awards and upholding capitalism.

You see I often find myself thinking and coming to the slow realization that skewed movements are only upheld by the meddling hands of key higher-up players as a benefit to their own socioeconomic standing. Meaning what and who you are seeing is not exactly what and who you are getting - or truly ever even wanted.

Yeah, maybe I'm being a pessimistic cynic, but I've grown very sick and tired of playing this game.

Mainly because they don't know, as I and Takeoff always say: 

I sees the plot.

So...about this post: #RepresentationMatters.

Yeah, that movement has deviated and it has deviated FAR.

Where I once believed it to be dedicated towards amplifying and providing a platform to otherwise unheard voices and unseen identities as they volley between the beauty and pain of existence, I have grown to know and see better. This so-called revolution of image has now regressed to what often feels like a corny overflow of "Otherness as palatable to the White elite".

We once relished the diversity of experience - meaning in front and behind the camera, there was narrative and creative agency to a story. How quickly it dwindled back into finding comfort in safety and the white norm.

Maybe I bought into the illusion early because I got to witness it as a child. Maybe I still buy into that hope because I, too, was being promised, told and sold on the idea that my voice was important long before I became aware of the fact that it was.

But still, much like the Natural Hair Movement that overtook YouTube, I couldn't shake the feeling of discomfort that stirred in my soul every time I would see a conventionally attractive, never unseen or overlooked person (or persons) cross my periphery and accost my ears with the same script:

"I did (insert whatever self-serving 'brave' thing they have done, here) because I felt like I had never seen myself in (insert whichever medium that has certainly been host to their same globally palatable identity here) before. The opportunity to shed light on (insert whichever social issue will either be lazily or hastily touched upon) is so important for my community, and I know this self-serving opportunity will help to open more doors for more stories like these (same, safe, palatable manifestations of 'Otherness)."

To think, this spiel actually used to mean something to me.

Does that sound familiar to anyone?

This speech is an affront to my intelligence. Especially in 2019 when every version of this aforementioned "diversity of representation" has yet to veer past anything more than safe, palatable existences. Claims of invisibility shrouded underneath desirability aesthetics, empty words meant to convince me and justify why this representation is so very important.

As a quick aside: this speech is also a subtly manipulative way to teach underrepresented people to settle for anything handed their way.

Good or bad.

Returning to my point, I have come to internalize that seeing a consistent celebration of true, ugly, HUMAN difference as not determined or gate kept by the White elite is to be alive to witness Halley's comet twice.

An anomaly. A scientific miracle.

Remember Syndrome, the villain from the first Incredibles  movie? There was a line he said which, when adjusted for some words, is applicable across all matters:

"When everyone is super, no one is."
"When everyone is marginalized, no one is."
"When every identity is unseen, no one is seen."

If everyone is saying the same thing, everyone is the same.

We each carry with us a uniquely individual story, and yet there are some stories which we have all heard ad nauseum. Recognizing that some stories can and should take a back burner is not a request which cannot be accommodated, yet #RepresentationMatters will convince you that is not the case.

It is a tricky minefield to navigate, and an intentional weaponization of social justice jargon meant to protect white spaces from critique.

Because how dare you critique when so much "progress" has been made.

As of late, I have begun to feel as though #RepresentationMatters regressed into this weird, undefinable thing whereafter everyone is clamoring to say they have never seen themselves so as to be on my front screen. So as to be seen. So as to take up space. So as to win an award.

So as to be The First.

The First to win that award.

The First to advance that record to a new height.

The First to break a barrier.

The First to promise to open the door which was shut in their face.

It's all a lie.
It's all marketing.

I was able to see parts of myself in Phoebe Buffay, Toni Childs, Lizzie McGuire, Galleria Garibaldi, Shug Avery, Kelly Kapoor and Buffy Summers - and most none of them looked anything like me.

Sure, some of us shared Blackness and/or womanhood and/or extreme vanity, but it was personality more than anything in which I saw myself.

I don't need to look like someone for a message to resonate, I just need to relate to them on a base level.

That we share physical attributes would only be an added benefit.

And even then, the shared representation doesn't much too much impact my relationship with the thing, rather my ability to understand the thing.

My representation, meaning darkskinned, Black woman has existed and persisted throughout the time I have been alive. Consistently? Absolutely not. Especially within my own age range, a growing problem when ACTUALLY analyzing the limited variety of Black female representation in media.

This means confronting colorism, texturism and how what is now deemed as 'acceptable' versions of Black female youth has impacted all Black youth.

Sure, the archives persist but change must start now.

#RepresentationMatters was once a meaningful mission that has now started to feel meaningless. It does not take away from the importance of the goal, but it does begin to claw at an emotion I have long tried to ignore.

So therein lies the peak of my issues with #RepresentationMatters. It's massive wave and inumerable layers has diverted my focus from taking actionable steps to dismantle any industry which props violent, redundant, reductive and/or, frankly, boring narratives, to cresting on muted satisfaction based on what I, the consumer, am only seeing. It has made my focus on the immediately visible a priority, when it should be an afterthought.

And I feel stupid as hell for not seeing that from the very beginning.

Maybe one day we may get back to the start, but for now - much like with #BlackGirlMagic - the time has come for me to remove myself from affiliating with this narrative.